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Play-Mate Of The Apes (2002)

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Overall Rating 47%
Overall Rating
Ranked #9,219
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Connections: Planet Of The Apes

Three sexy astronauts crash land on a planet where apes rule. They attract the attention of human-friendly scientist Dr Kweera and the wild woman Uvala and soon unbridled female lust threatens ape society. --IMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: April 17, 2010
It's been a while, but thanks to the upcoming "Late-Nite TV Sexy Spoof Collection" DVD set that I just so happen to hold in my hands, I do believe that it's time for another helping of softcore from our good friends over at Seduction Cinema. Play-Mate of the Apes is one of the few Misty Mundae movies that I never got around to checking out due to its out-of-print status and high used prices, so it was with great pleasure that I sat down with a "new" Misty movie from back in her prime. Watching this movie made me remember why I fell in love with the woman and these softcore parodies in the first place.

The storyline is fairly flimsy, as is the norm in these movies, and it centers around a trio of astronauts - Commander Gaylor (Misty Mundae), Lt. Pushkintucushkin (Anoushka), and Lt. Fornication (Sharon Engert) - who are traveling through deep space. Pushkintucushkin and Fornication decide to tear off their spacesuits and get down and dirty with a little lesbian action while Gaylor sleeps, and unfortunately for our girls, Fornication accidentally hits a button during the grand finale. I'm not quite certain what the button does, but I do know that it sets off an alarm that wakes up the commander, and she immediately goes into panic mode saying that they're all going to die. They don't, but the ship does land on a planet inhabited by damned dirty apes and primitive humans.

The girls eventually meet Uvula (Darian Caine), an over-sexed cavewoman who is more than happy to share her "goods", but the party doesn't last long as the apes kidnap all of these inferior humans and take them back to their headquarters. Led by the tyrannical Captain Laid (Zachary W. Snygg, aka John Bacchus), these apes believe the humans to be nothing more than pitiful creatures with no souls and no dancing abilities (seriously). When Misty decides to do a seductive strip-tease with a bit of dancing thrown in for good measure, the apish Dr. Cornholeous (Debbie Rochon) comes to the realization that these humans may be on par with the apes after all. She decides to assist them in their escape, but the other apes won't be far behind and an epic battle will certainly be in the future for all involved... oh, and lesbian sex. Lots of lesbian sex.

Much like the other finer releases from Seduction Cinema, there are basically two halves to be found in Play-Mate of the Apes: the storyline half and the softcore lesbian sex half. The softcore half is what it is, and you can tell right now without even seeing the movie whether or not you'd be interested in that portion - do you want to see Misty Mundae getting it on with Darian Caine, Anoushka, and Sharon Engert (as well as various combinations of the latter three)? You're going to love it, as the sex scenes come fast and furious and are shot rather well. Not too interested in that? You're going to be fast-forwarding through half of the movie. It's that simple, but really, who could say no to Misty, Darian, and Anoushka? I could do without Sharon Engert and her plastic charms, but the other three ladies could turn a gay man straight.

As for the storyline side of things, the film plays out much like the other parodies from Seduction Cinema, delivering a plot that is somewhat related to the source material with lots of goofy comedy and plenty of toilet humor. Yes, the "damned dirty apes" line comes into play, and indeed, the Statue of Liberty makes an appearance (as well as the Clinton memorial), but the humor is what makes the film work. It's fairly low-brow, granted, but seeing Darian Caine on all fours pissing on an ape's leg like a dog would... well, it's not for everyone, but if you dig those kind of laughs or if you've enjoyed any of the other parodies from Seduction Cinema, you'll love this one. Oh, and you also get to see Misty Mundae rapping, which was downright surreal.

Overall, I enjoyed the film - maybe not as much as SpiderBabe and the other top-notch parodies from the company, but at the same time, it was better than a fair chunk of their other releases. The jokes are funny, the storyline is as good as one could expect from a film like this, and yes, the sex scenes are great. What more could you ask for? 8/10.
Crispy #1: Crispy - added April 17, 2010 at 8:08am
The first Misty movie I ever saw; late night on Cinemax. I like how the Russian kept her hat on throughout her scenes.
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