Posted by Crispy on May 6, 2017
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Yeah, the Sony/Marvel deal is looking more and
more like a complete shit show as news is
released. Apparently they're going to use the
Miles Morales Spider-Man going forward, so maybe
they can keep both franchises going without
stepping on each other's toes.
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Posted by Crispy on September 27, 2016
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Wait, you don't like John Goodman? He's had his
duds, but by and large I love good stuff.
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Posted by Crispy on June 18, 2016
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Watched it again without the initial green tinted
lenses, the convoluted plot was more noticeable. I
still loved the hell out of it, and I stand by the
score, but the review probably needs an additional
paragraph detailing that bit.
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Posted by Crispy on October 10, 2015
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Bride is already reviewed and in the pipeline, as
is Son.
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Posted by Crispy on September 21, 2015
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Absolutely loved every second of it!
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Posted by Crispy on June 4, 2015
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While I begrudgingly admit it was better than
eight, Jason Goes to Hell is still terrible.The
body-jumping idea was stupid. This half-cocked
idea that Jason was actually a demon, but yet
still tied to a mortal bloodline was stupid. This
all-knowing sage archetype was stupid. The
transforming knife thing was stupid. They couldn't
even throw us any good aesthetics either. Tent
scene aside, there was nothing special about any
of the kills, and in the ten minutes of
screen-time Jason got, he looked terrible and not
in the good way. Then there was the big climax,
featuring a bunch of demon hands that looked like
something from the latest Muppets movie.Somewhere
in all this mess, there's one or two concepts that
could have formed the foundation of a well-done
Jason Goes to Hell, but they sure weren't used.
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Posted by Crispy on June 3, 2015
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Complete garbage. Not only was the New York angle
blatantly pissed away, but there were way to many
sloppy ideas. Crystal Lake is in Sussex New
Jersey, a landlocked county in north western
jersey, a mere 75 miles from Manhattan. Yet this
boat is leaving on a 24 hour oceanic cruise to the
city. I understand wanting to change things, but
at least think a little bit about how to get him
there. Plus, the concept with child Jason was
mind-numbingly retarded, not to mention way out of
the series timeline. Jason's new found ability of
teleportation is just pure laziness. The toxic
waste thing was worth nothing more than a confused
blink and a depressed sigh. If you simply ignore
this one, the franchise is better for it.
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Posted by Crispy on May 31, 2015
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I disagree, this was one of the more faithful
adaptations I've ever seen, save a few bits here
and there, most of which took their inspiration
from Universal's classic. The only one I really
hated was the Elizabeth scene. As for the ending,
it's very close to the novel's ending, but
features a melodramatic, sappy twinge to it that
did no favors to either this movie or the pages
that inspired it. 7/10
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Posted by Crispy on March 18, 2015
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Chaplin as in Charlie Chaplin? I've seen a skit
from Gold Rush that was hysterical. Wanted to look
more into him.
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Posted by Crispy on February 25, 2015
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This was pretty fucking terrible. In a good way I
mean. Lots of blood, lots of boobs, plenty of
tongue in cheek action. Plus, I kind of liked the
aesthetic of the werewolf. It looked extremely
cheap of course, but it was a really nice thought.
No reason to watch this again, but I enjoyed it
when it was on.
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Posted by Crispy on February 2, 2015
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Always found this an average movie at best, but
it's got one of the best transformation scenes in
werewolf cinema.
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Posted by Crispy on November 18, 2014
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Up until the final episode, I was fully intent on
giving this three stars without reservation and
calling it the weakest season yet, but damn did it
end on a fucking high note. My opinion is kind of
opposite of yours: I was captivated by the flu
angle and found it had some truly suspenseful
moments, while the separation half didn't really
hold my attention. Like you said, it was nice
seeing some backstory and some of the secondary
characters get some screen time, but as a whole,
it seemed like the season's plot was just
floundering, killing time until that final episode
set the stage for season five. The Beth/Darryl arc
was especially taxing; felt like some crap off of
Dawson's Creek.
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Posted by Crispy on November 12, 2014
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The beginning was pretty slow, but it picked up
beautifully towards the end, even if the final
five minutes were a bit anti-climatic. Still,
looking forward to Season 4.
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Posted by Crispy on October 31, 2014
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Two years later, and I've come to really
appreciate Ruffalo's Banner over Norton. I
mentioned that I kind of liked how Ruffalo didn't
have Norton's innate charisma, and that thought
has strengthened in my mind since I've written
this review. Likewise, I also think using
Ruffalo's face for the Hulk was a better decision;
it makes sense given it's supposed to be a huge
mutation. I still think they should have used Lou
Ferigno's voice though.
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Posted by Crispy on October 9, 2014
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Really liked this one myself; pretty nice update.
Moretz was damned good. It's a shame that anyone
who takes on this role will be stuck in Sissy
Spacek's shadow. Wasn't a fan of Julianne Moore
though. She just couldn't toe that overacting line
enough for me.
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Posted by Crispy on June 16, 2014
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Watched this again and loved it just as much. I
will say though, they really missed an opportunity
to put all of those monitor scenes in the the
bonus features of the DVD.
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Posted by Crispy on June 8, 2014
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The rights are tied up somewhere. Toho's plan is
to let them expire and then move forward with a
release. SumoGorilla has a nice bootleg for a low
price though.
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Posted by Crispy on June 6, 2014
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I loved this from beginning to end. Thank you
Tristan for mentioning the music, as the score
throughout was a huge part of why I enjoyed it so
much.
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Posted by Crispy on June 3, 2014
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I just feel like it's more "authentic;"
you can really see what the actors are laying out
there. A great example is Invasion of
Astro-Monster, which cast American actor Nick
Adams speaking in English. The Japanese version
dubs him over, while the English version uses the
straight recording. He was awesome, but the
dubbing was flat. It killed the whole performance.
Even if the dubbing is better than what the actor
gives, I still can't shake the feeling that it's
fake, and it takes away from things. Also, and
admittedly it may just be because I'm used to
them, but by movie's end reading the sub-titles
becomes subconscious.
As for them being
"funnier," well if that's your thing,
you go Glen Coco lol. I know a lot of people enjoy
MST3King the quick monotones that usually define
the dub-jobs, but it doesn't do anything for me.
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Posted by Crispy on May 23, 2014
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Shout!'s releases come in both dubbed and subbed;
Gamera and Gamera vs. Baragon are separate and the
remaining Showa movies are in two packs. As a fan
of subbed I almost wish this had been around
before I bought them all separately. Take up a lot
less room on the DVD shelf.
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Posted by Crispy on April 10, 2014
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Like Avatar, I haven't seen to much of the source
anime, so we're talking the movie alone. This
didn't hold my attention as well as The Last
Airbender did, nor did it plant a seed of the
interest for the cartoon. Skip it.
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Posted by Crispy on April 6, 2014
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As someone who hasn't seen a single episode of
Avatar, this wasn't that bad. Not good, but not
bad. The effects were nicely done, but there was
definitely way too much plot slammed into to short
of time. Ideally, this would have been released as
a two parter, maybe even with each film hitting
that three hour mark, to tell its story. 4/10
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Posted by Crispy on April 1, 2014
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Which is why the two thoughts are separated with a
hard return. Ready? Here comes another one.
Whether or not you like my opinion has no
absolutely no bearing on the fact that it is my
opinion. That's the fact that you're missing. You
have no conviction in your opinions; to you an
opinion is a fragile thing that needs to be
sheltered and protected lest a different one
should come along and obliterate it. That's why
you've replied twice and haven't responded
directly to any one of my counterpoints. That's
why you can't tell the difference between me
disagreeing with this review and me bashing it
(Wanna know a secret? I liked his review too).
That's why you think "That's just your
opinion" is a retort instead of an
observation. That's why you threw a tantrum
because I made a joke bashing whatever movie you
bought. And that's why I write reviews and you
copy/paste public domain compilations.
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Posted by Crispy on April 1, 2014
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Every review on this site has opinion stated as
fact. However, the majority of us have enough
common sense to realize they're opinions simply by
reading them without needing to be spoon fed.
And yes, it is (factually) a misleading
title.
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Posted by Crispy on March 31, 2014
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Uh oh, here comes Bill again, unable to tell the
difference between a mindless insult and a
differing opinion. First off, I gave reasons in
the comment why I didn't like the movie. Second
off, I didn't bash the review at all. Hurled some
insults at the movie, sure, but nothing at the
review itself. Also, I love your little sign off.
"How about writing your own review" As
if I'm afraid or unable to put my thoughts into
words and put them out for the world to comment
on. In case you forgot, I've written plenty. And
yes, I've written reviews where people have
thought I was out of my mind for liking this, for
not liking that. Yet somehow, I find the
perseverance to carry on, even though I've had
people tell me they don't think like I do.
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Posted by Crispy on March 28, 2014
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Really? Not perfect by any stretch. Sure, it's a
decent little flick; I'd definitely recommend it
but 10/10? Not remotely. The biggest problem is
the film's villain. You can't go from Christopher
Lee to David Peel. Lee knows how to simply portray
malice in every motion, whereas Peel just looked
goofy. Anytime he was trying to be scary he
reminded me more of a child at Halloween.
Also, The Brides of Dracula is still a stupid
and misleading title. They're not Dracula's brides
at all, so any ill-feelings towards Dracula's
exclusion here is well-warranted. Plus, why the
hell is the movie named after them anyway? They're
in there for about five minutes, and do nothing
but hide in the corner, hissing.
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Posted by Crispy on February 24, 2014
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Rest in Peace Egon. May your ghost never be
busted.
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Posted by Crispy on February 14, 2014
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Apparently, Phillip Seymour Hoffman had completed
his scenes for Part 1 of Mockingjay, and had only
one key scene left in Part 2, which they plan on
handling with a slight rewrite and some tricky
camera work. It's a bit of a shame really; the
franchise is shaping up to end on a high note, but
it's not exactly a magnum opus for the man to go
out with.
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Posted by Crispy on November 24, 2013
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Me and a buddy were talking about this, and it
would have been leagues better had they brought in
Baxter Stockman instead. Maybe the budget wasn't
there for the fly costume and the mousers, but it
could have matched II's cheesiness (which was
still at an acceptable level), and actually gave
fans something to smile about. Rat King would have
been another great villain for the movies, but
they'd have to return to the original grittiness
to do him justice.
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Posted by Crispy on July 21, 2013
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Its certainly worth noting that the driver of that
school bus was played by Robbie Rist, who voiced
Michelangelo in the ninja turtles trilogy. I
really liked this. It didnt top Sharktopus, but it
was a damned good one.
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Posted by Crispy on July 16, 2013
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I was absolutely loving it...until the final 20
minutes. Decisions made in those last twenty
minutes damned near ruined the whole movie for me.
It still earned itself a spot on my DVD shelf I
think, but it's a shame to see how fast it fell
from "amazing" to "good."
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Posted by Crispy on June 20, 2013
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Devil's Rejects was a completely different affair.
The movie just focused on the antagonists, but
they were still unquestionably the bad guys. They
didn't just pick up a chainsaw and start defending
the girl from a completely separate antagonist.
Even though Jason in FvJ kind of went this route,
he wasn't actively protecting the kids so much as
they were able to manipulate the two into taking
each other out. In other words, he stayed a bad
guy.
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Posted by Crispy on June 17, 2013
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This was awesome in theatres with the
sunglass-style glasses, but yeah, the DVD is much
better served in 2D.
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Posted by Crispy on June 14, 2013
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I feel like that whole list of complaints is more
accurately aimed at Jason. Clash feels like a
single tightly-knit adventure, whereas Jason has
such an episodic feel to it that it disjoints the
whole voyage. And once again, it doesn't even
include the entire end of his quest. The acting is
also leaps and bounds better in Clash. I like the
somewhat doubtful Harry Hamlin over the
movie-hero-bravado that Todd Armstrong brought
much more. Disregarding the heroes , let's look at
the gods even. Clash's gods were more like the
ones we read about in school, overly-proud and
constantly squabbling with each other, instead of
the happy-go-lucky bunch Jason dealt with. Towards
this same end, Laurence Oliver's Zeus blew Niall
MacGinnis out of the water. As for Harryhausen's
stuff, I can easily see how that skeleton fight
would top your list. That was a great fight, but
in my personal opinion, the Medusa scene is nigh
untoppable. Plus, on a more personal note, Clash
of the Titans was a childhood staple of mine,
whereas I saw Jason and the Argonauts in my 20s.
That nostalgia is admittedly carrying my opinion a
great deal. Now as for that owl....Yeah, I'll give
you that one.
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Posted by Crispy on June 7, 2013
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I watched this again, and actually really liked
it. It's kind of a subtle tongue-in-cheek parody
of things then anything else.
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Posted by Crispy on May 23, 2013
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Not sure how many people care about spoilers on
this wack ass release, but just in case:
http://www.wwedvdnews.com/full-list-wwe-raw-top-10
0-moments-dvd/30441/ There's the list.
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Posted by Crispy on May 23, 2013
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That moment was half that and half the 10-man
match at the end where they officially merged and
introduced Stephanie. Once again, maybe that
moment lost a lot of its weight with me being I
missed ECW's hey day.
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Posted by Crispy on March 17, 2013
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Four months after this writing, Michael Cole's
Worst Announcer streak has continued for a fourth
consecutive year. Between that, his horrid heel
run (which also earned a WON Worst Gimmick award),
and that wrestlemania crap with Lawler, I can only
imagine what dirt he has on one or more McMahons.
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Posted by Crispy on January 25, 2013
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Absolutely nothing amazing, but I dug it. High
6/Low 7
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Posted by Crispy on January 4, 2013
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Three years later it dawns on me that Christina
Ricci played a Long Island chick with a Brookyln
Accent. Go figure.
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