Once upon a time, way back a long time ago
When the universe consisted of nothing more elaborate than Mark Bolman
Uh-huh, thank you Frank
And don't mispell it, that's not Marc Bolan, that's Mark Volman
Hi, you friends, I wanna welcome each and everyone of you
I wanna say to you tonight I feel great
I mean, I feel great
Everywhere I go people are always coming up to me
And they say, "Mark, Mark, Mark" (Mark, Mark, Mark)
"Mark, are you kidding?"
Let me tell you this, friends, I am not kidding
I mean, I am portly and I am maroon
Well, how many people tonight here can guess what I am?
Uh, not me (I can't guess what you are)
Well, then I'll give you some clues
And the first clue is, I am portly
Is that help?
Not much (no)
I don't know who you are (I see)
Okay, I got one
Clue number two
I am double knit
Does that help?
No, not much (what do you mean?)
Well, then I've to give you one more clue
I know this is gonna give it away and I hate like damn to tell you what it is
But clue number three
Ich bin maroon
Ah, you're a sofa
Way back a long time ago
When the universe consisted of nothing more elaborate than Mark Volman (thank you, Frank)
Trying to convince each and every member this extremely hip audience here tonight
That he was nothing more, nothing less
Than a fat maroon sofa
Suspended in the midst of a great emptiness
A light shined down from heaven
And there he was, ladies and gentlemen
The good Lord
And he took a, he took a look at the sofa
And he said to himself, quite an attractive sofa
This sofa could be commercia (thank you, Frank, how are you Frank?)
With a few more margaritas and the right company
However, I digress
"What this sofa needs", said the big G
"Is a bit of flooring underneath of it"
And so, in order to make this
Construction project possible
He summoned the assistance of the celestial core of engineers
And, by means of a cute little song in the German language
Which is the way he talks whenever it's heavy business
The good Lord went something like this
Take it away, Jim Pons
Gib zu mir etwas fussbodenbelag
Unter diesen fetten fliessenden sofa (everybody)
Gib zu mir etwas fussbodenbelag
Unter diesen fetten fliessenden sofa
And of course ladies and gentlemen, that means
Give unto me a bit of flooring under this fat floating sofa
And sure enough boards of oak appeared throughout the emptiness as far as vision permits
Stretching all the way from Belfast to Bogner Regis
And the Lord put aside his huge cigar
And proceeded to deliver unto the charming maroonish sofa
The bulk of his message
With the assistance of a small electric clarinet, and it went something like this
|
