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George Carlin - Parental Advisory: Explicit Lyrics - I Ain't Afraid of Cancer
Parental Advisory: Explicit Lyrics
01. Offensive Language
02. I Ain't Afraid of Cancer
03. Some People Are Stupid
04. Rape Can Be Funny
05. Feminist Blowjob
06. Good Ideas
07. Things You Never See
08. Things You Never Hear
09. Things You Don't Wanna Hear
10. Life's Little Moments
11. I Love My Dog
12. Organ Donor Programs
13. Don't Pull the Plug on Me
14. They're Only Words
15. Euphemisms
Yeah, about time for me to get a little drink of water. Figure this stuff is safe to drink? Huh?
Actually I don't care if it's safe or not, I drink it anyway. You know why? Cause I'm an American and I expect a little cancer in my food and water.
That's right, I'm a loyal American and I'm not happy unless I've let government and industry poison me a little bit every day.
Let me have a few hundred thousand carcinogens here.

Ahh, a little cancer never hurt anybody. Everybody needs a little cancer I think.
It's good for you. Keeps you on you're toes.
Besides, I ain't afraid of cancer... I had broccoli for lunch.
Broccoli kills cancer. A lot of people don't know that, it's not out yet.
It's true. You find out you got some cancer...(click) get yourself a fucking bowl of broccoli.
That'll wipe it right out in a day or two. Cauliflower too.
Cauliflower kills the really big cancers. The ones you can see through clothing from across the street.
Broccoli kills the little ones. The ones that are slowly eating your way from inside... while your goddamn, goofy, half- educated doctor keeps telling you, "your doing fine Jim."
In fact bring your doctor a bowl of broccoli. He's probably got cancer too.
Probably picked it up from you. They don't know what their doing, it's all guesswork in a white coat.
Here, let me have a few more sips of industrial waste.

Ahh, maybe... maybe I can turn them cancers against one another.
That's what you gotta hope for you know, that you get more than one cancer so they eat each other up instead of you.
In fact, the way I look at it, the more cancer you got, the healthier you are.