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Fuck you, look at my cool hat
I could be anything, anytime
With the right potion, invocation: many rhymes
Expended in the process
Compression so fresh, you wonder am I lossless
Does it cost this too?
Is there any question what I'm willing to do?
Tip the lid off, tilt the flask in hand
Taste like ass but the task is grand
Been the lastest man picked for the kickball
Incoordinate: to hit, I miss a brick wall
That won't help an unpopular pick
Take a swig, now I'm captaining shit
And I'm putting legitimate players on duty
To gather them beauties what thought I had cooties
Is it one attribute you did not roll?
Is it one bottle in the Bag of Hold?
Is it one goal: to pass the stat check?
To sip the extract, you command the respect
Is it one attribute you did not roll?
Is it one bottle in the Bag of Hold?
Is it one goal: to pass the stat check?
To sip the extract, you command the respect
By the CHA on my character sheet
Yes, I pencil a plus; thus, I deem it discrete
From the inked-in single-digit charm that I got
In initial calculations, weighted and fraught
With compromises (not with surprises)
No shock to the misers of points when I'm leveling up
That the prizes all go in one cup (which one?)
INT increased always and didn't start low
Now it got so high, I get to fake the flow
Just by figuring out the simulation and enacting
I get crafty, take a vial's worth exactly
Another couple sips, I'm up on top of the world
Yet another to my lips, the way rhymes get hurled
You'd affix to my person impossible statistic
A temporary boost, it desists quick
Yes, you might consider Frontalot an expert in the subject
Soaking in the potion such a length, I make a subset
Of bath-time wrinkles, devote them to this:
Amplification of fabulousness
Take a stab at a dis, note it doesn't connect
So buffed, you don't even need to look up the check
Just hand the dice over, hang the head low
Don't blame it on the Captivation enchantment on the robe
Boots of Beguiling leave a sparkle where I tread
+8 Helm of Glamour merely flatters my head
What I said was: the outfit is ornamental
It's incidental. The elixir's effect is ungentle:
It blends me with confident types
If I lift a toast to them, am I being polite?
To the kids who arbitrated on the topic of cool:
Look at my cool hat and fuck you
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