May I help you?
Yeah, I'd like to straighten out this
Funny little drinking problem I got
You'd like to what?
Work on this drinking problem. People tell
Me I got a drinking problem, I seen your ad
Yeah, well what do you think you have?
Personally, I like it. I, I don't think I have much of a problem
But if everybody's telling me, there must be something wrong here
Where do you live?
I live in Manhattan
Well, my only and best suggestion to you would-
Yeah, well you know, I always get complaints from the wife
You know, I'm coming around, kicking the dog upside down in
The apartment, throwing shit around, busting things, you know?
Is that normal behavior for you?
Eh, some... I've always acted that way since I was young. I always
Had a bit of a temper. You know, I, some guy tells me in the street
Today I park a little too close to his car, I busted his jaw for him
I mean, I've always been hot-wired like that, so I'm really not that
. You know, that don't bother me, that shit. But, you know, if
They say I got a drinking problem, we may, we should check into it
Well, you're, you're the key to it. Why don't you go to an AA meeting?
Well, I don't think it's my drinking so much as my, you know
Being high-strung. I'm, I'm liable to throw down at the
Drop of a hat. You know, you piss me off one way, you go
The other way, I put a shoe so far up your ass. I get
Really pissed off fast. You know, other than the fact, too-
I'm a psychiatrist
Well, you know, other than the fact, too, I drink about
A bottle and a half of Jack Daniels a day. I whack
Down a six-pack at night, you know, to calm my nerves
How's this temper of yours when you don't drink?
Man, the temper's, my, my, my temper's always flaring like a pack
Of hemorrhoids. I'm all, I'm nutty, I'm a crazy kind of guy
Yeah, I can hear that!
I'm always swinging at the fences, you know? You get
In my way, I'll roll right over you. I'm sick. But
You think there's a problem with the drinking, huh?
Oh, I can't answer that, only you can answer that
Eh, personally, I like myself. And I'll tell you the
Truth, you're getting on my nerves. I don't think I need
Any help with anything. Well, I'll talk to you later
Okay!
Okay, see you later then
|
