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The FuMP Volume 19: January-February 2010
01. Divorcing the Kids
02. Ten Foot Two, Skin of Blue
03. Elvis Porn (live)
04. Zombie Apocalypse Barbecue
05. Degrade Me Marcia Brady
06. Welcome Home, Frank
07. Everyone Should Play V-TES 'Cause Somebody's Gotta Be Worse Than Me
08. I'm Not Your Personal IT Guy
09. OMG
10. Hookin' for Drugs (In All the Wrong Places)
11. Uranus! (Fump Re-Probe)
12. Grumbledy
13. Bare Facts
14. Oh Won't You Show Your Cans
15. Fuzzy Navel
16. The Naughty Wench
17. Cheap-Ass Cyborg
18. God Hates Comedy Musicians
Tiptoed up the stairs, climbed into the attic
Opened up my Grandma's trunk; well, isn't this dramatic?
What could be inside? I could almost squeal
With delight as I pulled out an ancient, dusty reel

Oh-woah!

(Thank you! Thank you very much)

There was a label on the side reading "E.A.P."
I wondered to myself, what could this be?
I dashed to my projector with excitement in my eyes
But as the footage rolled it rather took me by surprise

'Cause Elvis Porn is what I viewed
There he was, completely in the nude
Strumming his guitar, quivering his lips
Singing in the microphone and shaking his hips

Oh, Elvis Porn, holy guacamole
The big fat buck naked king of rock and roll
He was devoid of any clothes, with his naughty bits exposed

Oh, what a sight, that Elvis Porn

What the hell, I thought, this is rather odd
I thought of where I found it, and I shouted, oh my god!
Where did Grandma get this footage of the King?
Why the hell would sweet old Granny have this awful thing?
Oh-woah!

(Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis!)

So I confronted her with the footage I'd found
She didn't seem to recognize it, so I wound
The film in the projector and gave it a spin
She keeled over dead with a big fat grin

'Cause Elvis Porn is what she viewed
There he was, completely in the nude
Strumming his guitar, quivering his lips
Singing in the microphone and shaking his hips

Oh, Elvis Porn, holy guacamole
The big fat buck naked king of rock and roll
He was devoid of any clothes, with his naughty bits exposed
No blue suede shoes covering up his little toes
No white jumpsuit, and nobody knows
The tale behind this Elvis Porn

(Elvis, thank you very much)