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The boys say don't you do it
Get a grip for goodness sake
Why you getting married?
Such a big league mistake
You lose all your freedom
When you're solo you got it made
But while you guys are home whackin' it
I'll be with my new wife gettin' laid, have mercy
Well, they say you'll have no privacy
The old lady's always there
But the good news is she'll blow me
And let me shoot it in her hair
So while you're all out searching
For that strange piece of trim
Remember I don't have to wear a condom
Whenever I stick it in, no way
So you guys go watch your football
Trust me, I'll be fine
'Cuz after we brunch with her mother
I'm comin' home to a sixty-nine
And she'll go ah-ah, uh-lickety-lick,
Oo... ah... that's my husband's dick
Now fellas I'll be thinkin' of ya
Even though I've moved on
You'll always be my homies
But I'm puttin' down the bong
'Cause my soulmate's my whole life now
I knew the first time I kissed her
But if she ever stops having sex with me
I'll call you guys and we'll bang her sister, ah yeah,
Yeah, if she ever stops having sex with me
We'll all gang bang her hot sister
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