Now I'm a feller with a heart of gold
And the ways of a gentleman I've been told
The kind of guy that wouldn't even harm a flea
But if me and a certain character met
The guy that invented the cigarette
I'd murder that son-of-a-gun in the first degree
Now, it ain't cuz I don't smoke myself
And I don't reckon that it'll harm your health
Smoked all my life and I ain't dead yet
But nicotine slaves are all the same
At a pettin' party or a poker game
Everything gotta stop while they have that cigarette
[(Smoke, smoke, smoke that cigarette)(Puff, puff, puff and if you smoke yourself to death)]
Tell St. Peter at the Golden Gate
That you hates to make him wait
But you just gotta have another cigarette
Now in a game of chance the other night
Old Dame Fortune was a-doin' me right
The kings and the queens just kept on comin' round
Then I got a full and I bet 'em high
But my bluff didn't work on a certain guy
He just kept on raisin' and layin' that money down
Now he'd raise me and I'd raise him
I sweated blood, gotta sink or swim
He finally called and didn't even raise the bet
So I said "aces full Pops how 'bout you?"
He said "I'll tell you in a minute or two
But right now, I just gotta have a cigarette"
[(Smoke, smoke, smoke that cigarette)(Puff, puff, puff and if you smoke yourself to death)]
Tell St. Peter at the Golden Gate
That you hates to make him wait
But you just gotta have another cigarette
The other night I had a date
With the cutest little girl in the 48 States
A high-bred, uptown, fancy little dame
She loved me and it seemed to me
That things were 'bout like they oughta be
So hand in hand we strolled down lover's lane
She was oh so far from a cake of ice
And our smoochin' party was goin' real nice
So help me, Hannah I believe I'd be there yet
But I give her a kiss and a little squeeze
And she said, "ah, Marty, excuse me please
I just gotta have another, cigarette"
[(Smoke, smoke, smoke that cigarette)(Puff, puff, puff and if you smoke yourself to death)]
Tell St. Peter at the Golden Gate
That you hate to make him wait
But you just gotta have another cigarette
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