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All rise, order in the court
The honorable judge motherfuckin Too $
Hort presidin over Superior Players Court
First case is the state versus Fate Wilson aka Baby Flex
You bein charged with home invasion and hoe slaughter
For fuckin another nigga's bitch
Listen close to what I say, dog it might hurt ya
I be cuttin your girl, while you be gone to work bruh
When she first called my conscious was like "hell nah, Fate don't"
But she said I'm only around the corner at Popular Pump
Apartment 5-7-0-1
Told her I was eatin right now, be over there when I get done
Got there, knocked on the door, she
Opened up half naked lookin exquisite
Actin mad cause I ain't spoke to her
Since the last time a nigga hit it
She said don't worry forget it since we only have 30 minutes
'Fore her man came home from lunch so I bust my nut and raised up wit
Five minutes to spare, her man unaware
I saw him in traffic, beeped the horn and threw a deuce in the air
Young player, but I feel guilty bout cuttin a broad
I need counselin dog, I'm as guilty as charged
Simply because I fell victim to lustin
Knowin all the while it was my cousin girlfriend I had been fuckin
Damn, the court finds you guilty as charged
Your sentence is P-U-I school
For pimpin under the influence nigga
Next case, oh we got us a repeat offender in the house
Jenny Jones aka Shanna
Same ol' charge, you wanted in eight states
What's your story this time?
Oh yes your honor I see we talkin again
I have no representation now shall we begin
I know you seen my face before but hold on my friend
There's niggas gettin away wit doin the same shit I did
I can't do no bid
Got a mortgage and my kids, in the forest by the bridge
And I drives a Rolls Royce and a porridge wit them grills
So you understand, I was tryin to pay me some bills
When I was flippin out of state while I was takin a chill
True indeed met a couple friends, spent a couple ends
Took the top off wit a drop and let the bubble spin
Niggas got off in my knot and let them troubles in
So I decided to put that shit in my own hands
None of these hoes can fuck me, only God judge me
That man told me he loved me, and he flashed money
My only crime could just be livin it filthy
So let me hear it one mo' time, not guilty
Bailiff take her into custody
Next case, the state versus Velvet Jones aka Ludacris
You bein charged with impedin hoe traffick
Spendin too much time tryin to fuck one hoe
How do you plead Mr. Jones?
Man I'm the pimp of all pimps and y'all comin up short
Calm down before I hold yo' ass contempt of court
Your honor, just be cool, let me approach that bitch
And sprinkle seasonin on yo' ears on how I choke that bitch
And did she promise you the pussy mayne?
She certainly did
I got empty McDonald's cups in my car and my crib
She owe me somethin, bitch better show me somethin
Wrap her legs around my waist and start to throw me somethin
I'm simply the meanest, you lookin at the stroke of a genius
The only verdict made should be the subpoena of this penis
No objections or appeals, let's cut us a deal
And I promise to tell the truth, if my partner don't squeal
Awfully cautious, said the jury makes her nauseous
And she said she'd suck my dick if I dropped the charges
Oh no, time to make your kidney shifts
But didn't you fuck her best friend?
Oh I plead the fifth your honor
Yeah that sound like some shit you'll say
Old pimp ass nigga
Due to lack of evidence I'm droppin the charges
But don't let me see you in here again
Let this be a lesson learned
If you don't know your player rules
You liable to violate the game
And get sent away for a long long time
Remember, never hate on a real player
That ain't gon' get you nowhere mayne
It's a lot of hoes out there player so
Ain't no reason for you to fuck your best friend
Or your cousin or your brother's girl
Get your own bitch mayne y'knahmsayin?
You runnin 'round here, violatin major player rules
You bout to get the motherfuckin book thrown at yo' bitch ass
Fuckin 'round in this court
Y'knahmsayin? It's all about the money baby
If it ain't about the money, it ain't about shit
So all you niggas runnin 'round here
Horny than a motherfucker just tryin to fuck a bitch
Cause you wanna get a nut off
Think about that money first mayne
What is that bitch doin for you?
What are you gettin out of the situation?
Tryin to give a bitch somethin
What you gon' give her somethin for some pussy?
It's trickin mayne
Don't be a BIATCH!
Be a real pimp nigga
Make that hoe pay you for everythang you do
Everythang you do you got to get money mayne
All day all night
I wouldn't fuck a bitch for free
Just like I wouldn't rap for free motherfucker
Yeah you know my favorite word
BIATCH!
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