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Thank you
Well, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to dedicate
This next song to the lesbians in the audience
In fact, I'm gonna head out here and
I spotted some lesbians earlier
As I do in my pre-show dyke check
I'm just gonna pretend you guys are lesbians
Clearly you're not because, you know, there's a dude and you know, but
Let's pretend for the sake of argument
That they're lesbians for this song
Alright, ladies and gentlemen?
Alright, is everyone picturing they're lesbians?
I know I am
It's a little song for the girls
I know you love me
I know you do
That's why every time I come around
She's all over you
Because
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me?
Don't cha?
Don't cha?
Thank you, lesbians
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me?
Don't cha?
Don't cha?
Well, you know, ladies and gentlemen, we are in
Las Vegas, the entertainment capital of the world
And something you see on the strip all the time
Are these crazy impersonator acts, you know
Where they have people doing their
Impersonations of famous celebrities
And I thought it might be fun for me
To sing some of this music for you
With my fabulous talent as an impersonator
'Cause I'm not only a lounge singer, I'm a master voice person
So now with your permission, ladies and gentlemen
I'm gonna sing this wonderful Pussycat Dolls song
And I'm gonna channel some of the
Greatest entertainer/singers in the world
Let's start by having me sing "Don't Cha"
By the legendary 1960s folk singer Mr. Bob Dylan
Are you ready?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me?
Don't cha?
Don't cha?
Alright, that was good
Okay, now, ladies and gentlemen
I gotta get some water for this one
And now, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like
To do my impression of "Don't Cha"
By the Pussycat Dolls being sung by backup singer and
Vocal legend, Mr. Michael McDonald from the Doobie Brothers
Don't cha wish your girlfriend
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don't cha?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Boy, that's hard
That's hard on the balls
And now, ladies and gentlemen
"Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls as performed, get ready
By Lieutenant Sulu, George Takei, from Star Trek
Alright, here we go
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me?
Captain
Alright, that's the George Takei impression
Alright, so what do we do?
Thank you
We did Bob Dylan, right, Bobby?
And we did, uh, Michael McDonald and we did, uh, George Takei
Alright, I got the clincher
This is gonna be fabulous
This is my impression of the song "
Don't Cha" by Pussycat Dolls being sung
By Bjork
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
And there were whales and sunlight and toast
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me?
Don't cha?
I said don't cha?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was raw like me?
Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like Richard Cheese?
Don't cha?
Thank you, thank you so much
Thank you, thank you
Wow, that was, uh, I'm exhausted
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