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48%
Overall Rating
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Ranked #7,388
...out of 20,698 movies
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An epic tale about a group of whale watchers, whose ship breaks down and they get picked up by a whale fisher vessel. The Fishbillies on the vessel has just gone bust, and everything goes out of control.
--IMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: March 27, 2012
It's been a while since I've watched any movies, and honestly, it's because I sort of got burned out on doing the reviews. I have this thing where if I watch a movie and one of the other reviewers hasn't already reviewed it, I will do the review myself - no exceptions. Thus, every single movie that I have seen in the last six years is listed on this site, and since I didn't want to break that streak... well, no movie watching for me. The reason for my burn-out is simple: I watched a string of bad movies, and writing reviews for bad movies isn't very fun unless they are insanely awful and I get to completely tear them apart. These movies didn't really fit into that category, but they were by no means "good" either. So, I decided to break the streak today and pop in something that, based on title and premise alone, I thought that I would love. Has the streak ended? Well...
The story begins with a diverse group of foreigners (Americans, French, Germans, even an African) who are visiting Iceland and come together to go on a whale watching expedition. Unfortunately for them, the captain of the boat (Gunnar Hansen in a very small cameo) dies and leaves them stranded on a rusty old boat in the middle of nowhere. Things start to look up for them when they are rescued by a scraggly-looking man and brought aboard his whaling ship, and they even get introduced to the other members of this "crew" - the man's brother and their mother. However, it only takes about two minutes before the survivors make an unfortunate discovery: this crew is a sadistic group of monsters, and they brought these people aboard in order to slaughter them in the grisliest ways imaginable. Who will survive, and what will be left of them? The answer will surprise you.
Harpoon: Whale Watching Massacre is a great homage to the "sadistic family" genre of movies pioneered by The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, or for the younger readers out there, movies along the lines of The Devil's Rejects. It is a movie that attempts to appeal to fans of horror, violence, and bloodshed, and nobody else. There are no long explanations as to why these people are murderers, and there are no lengthy scenes in which the characters discuss their histories or aspirations. There are simply a group of survivors and a group of people who want to tear them to pieces. Let the script roll and let the body parts fall where they may.
Those of you looking for a brilliant script will want to look elsewhere, but those of you who simply want to see some carnage unfold will fall in love with this film. The kills are imaginative and they definitely fit the theme of the film (yes, one guy gets harpooned to death, and the scene is better than you may expect), while the effects used to bring these kills to life are top-notch. Everything is done with practical effects, I think... if there was any CGI used, it was so good that I didn't notice it. I mention this because there are throat-slashings, stabbings, and a decapitation, and all of these look highly realistic courtesy of the excellent practical effects. There are no "video game" kills that will take you out of the mood.
To make things even better, the acting from all involved is downright awesome. There are a handful of background characters who are there for nothing more than body count fodder, but even they are perfect in their roles. Leon (Terence Anderson), a gay black man who is one of the stars on the survivors team, is definitely the highlight of the bunch. I haven't seen him in anything else, but if this film was any indication, he has a bright future ahead of him in the film business. The obligatory female leads, Pihla Viitala and Miranda Hennessy, are also highly enjoyable in their roles, and again, I can't wait to see them in other films.
Of course, the villains are the real stars of the show, and once again, I have nothing but praise for them. Tryggvi (Helgi Björnsson) is the leader of the bunch, and the actor brings together a villain that you will absolutely loathe about five minutes after meeting him. Meanwhile, his brother Siggi (Stefán Jónsson) plays the dimwitted henchman to perfection, while Mamma (Guðrún Gísladóttir) pulls off the sadistic villain role to perfection. This is not a family that you will fall in love with as we saw in The Devil's Rejects - this is a family that is downright evil and who you will want to see get what is coming to them. You won't be disappointed.
Overall, I'm giving Harpoon: Whale Watching Massacre - Iceland's first splatter flick if the tagline is to be believed - an emphatic thumbs up and a huge recommendation for fans of vicious horror flicks. It is bloody, it is tense, and there are kills in there that you will not forget. If every movie that I popped in was this good, I would never again get burned out on watching and reviewing movies, and I'd probably bust out one or two a day. 10/10.
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