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The Whore That Wouldn't Die (2006)

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Overall Rating 77%
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Ranked #14,570
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A whore, Candy Azmunchen becomes infected with a strange virus which makes her crave human flesh. Her lover, Ranier, fights to save their relationship, but the the evil Dr. Fabian has other plans for Candy! Only Divine Intervention can save this dirty whore! --IMDb
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Review by Chad
Added: May 11, 2007
Sometimes, I really hate putting the proverbial pen to paper and writing a movie review, and jotting down my thoughts of a friend or acquaintance's film is definitely one of those times. Take this one guy, for example: I chatted with him online for months and followed the progress of his debut film up until it finally hit a point where I could review a screener copy, and, well... we didn't talk any more after that review hit the site, if you catch my drift. On the flip side, had I posted a positive review for this film and had you fine readers known about my behind-the-scenes chatting with the guy, I'd have been accused of being biased and kissing his ass. Tough spot to be in, right? Well, here we go with another review of a friend's film, and there's no hiding the fact that I know the guy due to the fact that it was co-directed by our very own Billy Ray Brewton (aka bluemeanie).

In this short film, a young lady of questionable moral values (Lindsey Kennedy) becomes infected with a strange virus that turns her into a flesh-hungry zombie whore. Her lover (Terry Hermes) decides to stick by her even in this time of crisis, but will his love be enough? Oh, and did I mention that this "Behind the Whore featurette" is told in a mockumentary style, complete with input from the people who were responsible for making this film within a film?

First off, the ass-kissing segment of the review. There were a lot of humorous moments to be found in here, but to spell them out in this writeup would sort of ruin the impact. For example, the "glasses" gag; this was comedic gold, but to point it out and have first-time viewers watching for it... well, it just wouldn't be the same as if you had caught it on your own. I also enjoyed the acting for the most part, especially the performances turned in by Terry Hermes (the lover) and Cindy DeSa (the provider of "Venezuelan Beaver Cheese"). I have no idea how much experience these people had in front of the camera, but I honestly had no complaints about anyone involved with it.

Now we arrive at the "Well, I hope we'll still be talking after he reads this" segment of the review. I felt that the movie ended way too abruptly and that there was more of a story that could have been told. Just after we're introduced to two very interesting (and humorous) characters and just when things are really getting good, the movie just sort of ends. In his defense, the movie was made for the 2006 Sidewalk Scramble Short Film Competition and one of the rules for this competition was that the movie had to be under five minutes in length, but still: in today's world of "director's cuts" and "extended editions", it would have been nice to have another five or ten minutes tacked on to properly wrap up the story. Ahh well... maybe in the sequel.

It's an interesting little movie, there's some solid laughs to be found, the acting is surprisingly good, and you don't even have to just take my word for it this time: you can watch the movie in its entirety over at the Digital Motion Pictures site to judge for yourself. Personally, I enjoyed it. 7/10.
bluemeanie #1: bluemeanie - added May 12, 2007 at 3:09am
I have actually written the sequel, which we plan to shoot late this Summer -- "The Whore That Wouldn't Die 2: The Whore Returns". This is not a mockumentary and is a strict B-movie parody. In this exciting sequel, Dr. Antonius Fabian escapes from the local insane asylum and kidnaps Dr. Gerry Gentile, desperate to turn the good doctor into a blood thirsty zombie. It's up to Ranier and Father McMerrin to stop Dr. Fabian, with the help of their dearly departed Candy Azmunchen. Can Father McMerrin summon the powers of righteousness one last time to defeat the sinister Dr. Fabian? You'll have to wait and see...
Tristan #2: Tristan - added May 15, 2007 at 1:39am
So I watched it, as well as all your other short films.
Sounds bad, but I found this to be the weakest of them all. However, it seemed the most planned, and made better use of locations, props, etc. Also had the best look. The b&w was a nice touch. And just like the rest of your shorts, it was indirectly funny. 7/10
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